Thursday, January 21, 2016

Don't stop dating!

If it's one thing I've learned over the years about being in a working, functional, and happy relationship... Don't take each other for granted. EVER. Because it doesn't matter if you're emotionally invested, or they are, it doesn't matter if kids or families or pets are involved. You can lose what you've come to expect.

Never just assume that the person you're with is happy and content. Don't ever just assume they know you love them. Never think that they know you find them attractive or desirable. You need to make certain by doing simple gestures, telling them, anything!

Remember the affection you showed each other when you first started dating? The small brushes of your hand down their arm, across their back, through their hair? The way you may lay your hand on their cheek when you kissed them?

Those actions should NEVER cease. Ever.

Plan dates. Even if it's in home dates. Even if it's something as simple as pizza and a movie. Even if it means swinging through a gas station and getting a fifty cent chocolate bar or candy they like. Stop along side the road for her and pick queen anne's lace to give her a pretty bouquet.

Even when you move in with each other, get engaged, walk down the aisle.... never stop dating each other. Never stop being ravenous for each other. Remember how it was when you first got together? You couldn't keep your hands off each other. Maybe it was every night, maybe it was once a week, but you found ways to be together, and show your affection for each other. Even if you have to schedule it in, DO IT.

Burn incense, a scented candle, wear a fragrance you know they love. Dress nicely now and then, style your hair, put on your make up, wear the heels, put away the tattered tennis shoes you wear every damned day.

Take the burden of a chore off their hands if they're having a bad day, a bad week, a bad month.

Never let them feel alone! EVER! No matter how frustrated you may get with each other, remember you chose to spend your time with this person, so why is it? Is it humor? Is it the way the silence between you is so comfortable? Is it the way they feel in your arms? Remember it, and show them that!

NEVER stop dating the person your with. Even when you're old and wrinkled and grey, and sex is a thing of the long forgotten past... A gentle kiss on the cheek, holding their hand in public.

Never think it has to be a grand gesture, or expensive. Sometimes it's the little things that matter! It's the THOUGHT put into the gestures, the words, that makes a person feel loved and special. You can't just stop doing them because you do them so often that it loses it's significance.... Oh look, Valentine's Day is just around the corner, I'll just do something nice then.

Really? Think again. Most people don't care for that holiday anymore. Most people want to be told they're loved, and SHOWN they're loved the other 364 days a year (365 this year) Once a month, bi weekly... make a point to do something nice and thoughtful for the person you're in love with. Because once the romance is gone... what have you become?

Without romance in a relationship... you're roommates. You're friends with benefits. You're taking that person for granted. You're assuming what you have will always be there.

Romance is what keeps that person around. Romance is what keeps them happy and content. Reminders of why they fell in love with you, and it keeps them falling in love with you every day.

Don't ever forget romance. It's not just a book genre. It's a way of loving someone. It's showing appreciation.

Never. Ever. Stop. Dating.

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